Scattered

When my oldest daughter invited me to be her friend on Facebook this morning I went ahead to the site. That was a big mistake. It took 7 minutes to connect (I have dial-up), a second to confirm that I was her friend, a minute or so to figure out who the stranger was who wanted to be my friend too (turned out to be a friend of hers), and another second to confirm (with some bemusement) that he too could be my friend. Then I was drawn to another button where I discovered that my youngest daughter conducts long conversations on Facebook. I decided to try the insanity test she was currently discussing, and found out that five friends in Toronto are sending me hate mail. (I didn't realize I had five friends in Toronto.) The test refused, however, to tell me what particular mental disorders my five responses indicated I was exhibiting. Magma bounced me off and when I tried to re-engage, I was unable to. Probably just as well. It had happened again ... that follow your nose insidiousness of the internet that lets you forget where you were intending to go and draws you along some convoluted winding pathway into the ether.

I am scattered enough just living my daily life. I don't think I need anything else to pull me off-track. One of the most effective ways for me to lose the ability to focus is to have to climb too many learning curves simultaneously. I seem to have lost the ability to multi-task efficiently since I left a career that demanded it all the time. Now I like one new learning experience at a time, thank you.

Learning to knit socks and create happy furniture were two very forgiving learning curves with gentle slopes. I am still climbing those and enjoying the view as I do.

The new camera is sitting there waiting for me to attempt to scale its walls to discover what mysteries lie behind them. I would like to get to the point where I can ask intelligent questions of Mud Mama when she comes.

So ... when Facebook reared its head and demanded that I learn to deal with it too, I thought too much, too soon, especially with a dial-up connection. I have an accelerator that I pay $3 per month for (in advance) . So far, in over a month it has saved me 20 minutes and 15 seconds or 2/3 of a minute per day. Hardly worth it, right?

I have to write Primus (Magma's new owner) a letter stating that I do not want the accelerator that does not accelerate, but I really would like them to connect me consistently and let me stay on-line on a regular basis. I loathe dial-up and I dislike Primus intensely. Maybe I should keep a pair of socks by the computer. I could knit a great deal while I am waiting, and I would be far less frustrated every time I was knocked off-line by whatever entity they keep sleeping at their end of the phone line.

And now to decide how to spend my day. Should I go to the Fallingbrook Community garage sale on the edge of Cumberland? Should I stay here and paint and learn more about my camera? Should I go and have coffee with my neighbour who lives at the end of the lake? Or should I call a friend who lives a few miles away, have tea, let the dogs play and take a look at the chairs in her barn?

I will likely decide based on which activities would be easiest on my back which is still unhappy, but then again, feeling as scattered as I am, I may just opt for stasis.

My mental health problem? Anxiety disorder which results in inability to think or act, exacerbated by the stress of having too many things on my plate and by being frustrated too often by things over which I have no control. Do I really need Facebook to tell me that? Any one of my regular blog readers could have diagnosed me.