Both Kerry (see comment) and my friend, Pat, who is a psychotherapist, weighed in on this one.
Pat said: I've never seen Pretty Woman, because---having worked as a hospital social worker with quite a lot of prostitutes, I couldn't bear the idea of making a romantic comedy out of such suffering. Mandy is right. The dreams will not come true. Most of the girls--and boys too---had come from backgrounds of cruelty and abuse, often sexual in nature, and were enacting their self hate and despair in the ways they got treated. They all hoped for loving rescue, and sought it with men who would ruthlessly exploit and re-abuse them.
My response to both Kerry and Pat is:
Of course, both you and Kerry are absolutely right. The premise is false and does not show the reality of the lives of most prostitutes, but there are women (and likely men too) who choose that life because they are not educated or intelligent or motivated enough to manage an everyday life with lower pay. Vivian in the film was uneducated but intelligent, and she didn't like earning a pittance. She was not one of the abused ones.
But ... you know ... I still think it is important to write about the romantic dreams of women in that situation. The idea of a happy ending in a white wedding dress was obviously romantic and silly ... but isn't that what Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty and all those other fairy tales are too? Except of course those rescued princesses were virginal.
I have a feeling that the writer wanted to write something that showed the falseness of the premise and the reality of the longing.
The comedic ending was the real mistake. Perhaps the greatest failure of the film was that, although not very subtle an ending, it was one that might lead very naiive girls to think it really could happen. (There were other failures too: the bad boy millionaire who turns into a good kind softie, for one.) It was not a realistic movie. It was a fairy tale.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
5 comments:
**"there are women (and likely men too) who choose that life because they are not educated or intelligent or motivated enough to manage an everyday life with lower pay."**
All of the prostitutes I've known were well-entrenched in poverty. I'm not sure I would consider their occupation a 'choice' as much as a last resort.
I'm so glad you are all reacting to this post. I was beginning to wonder if anyone was reading.
I worried about leaving that paragraph because I know that for virtually all prostitutes, and probably for all of them on the street, it is a last resort, not a choice.
In the movie Vivian chooses that life over working in McDonald's. Is that a choice or a last resort? Certainly not much of a choice, I guess.
I did say this was a fairy tale, and my conversation with Mandy certainly confirms my belief that prostitutes are no different from other girls and women who want that knight in shining armour to come and save them. It is a fairy tale no matter who wants to be rescued from the tower.
I've been reading every day. I'm impressed. I just don't always have something to say. But controversy is good for bringing people out of the woodwork. ;)
I would say a choice between McDonalds or prostitution is still a choice. Most of the prostitutes I've known have not had even that much of a choice. Addicts have very few options.
I guess I find this particular fairy tale disturbing because it attempts to portray something fundamentally ugly and exploitative as charming and desirable.
It does this by changing everything from something it is into something it isn't. Vivian bears no resemblance to any sex worker I've ever seen. The typical john is not a wealthy, handsome, kind man looking for love. Prostitution typically takes place in alleyways or cars, not in lavish hotel rooms. The movie strips all reality out of the situation.
This fairy tale calls for more than a suspension of belief; it calls for an outright rejection of my feminist principles. I saw it about ten years ago, and it pissed me off.
I've been trying to figure out how to reply to this - I agree with Zoom on this and here's a couple of other things - its just too big an issue for the "comments" section here but here goes...There is a huge difference between the original Grimm's tales and their own later editions which promoted *their* values - girls get punished for boldness boys get rewarded, the "Fairy Tales" that have been popularized are really dreck for girls - no girl should want to be a princess - they are baby factories and mute pawns in the political arena - they are used by men in power and their only power is in their dowery and their attractiveness. blech. Now if you want GOOD traditional fairy tales go to those told by the peasantry, look at baba yaga and vasilia stories, for current interpretations look at japanese director Miyasaki's characters - also taken from traditional folk tales.
Societies ills - homelessness, prostitution, addiction, gambling, abuse of marginalized peoples - have *nothing* to do with intelligence, and really very little to do with education level.
I guess I expect that a fairy tale cannot be true; that the characters are cardboard figures who are either black or white; that the plot is not believable; that the whole thing is a simple story intended for naiive children who believe until they outgrow fairy tales.
(And yes, Mud Mama, I am thinking of the fairy tales about girls in castles etc. not the better fairy tales you mention.)
That said; when a fairy tale is presented as a romantic comedy with real people playing the roles, the line between fairy tale and reality is blurred, and the viewer can be tricked into suspending disbelief. In this case, the anger of feminists is understandable.
Hard call for a writer, I think ... to make it so obviously a parody that there is no chance that any adult could be taken in ... or to be more subtle and therefore mislead people into believing that a bright beautiful young woman who ends up on the street could meet a handsome wealthy man who takes her away from that life ...
And maybe it is wishful thinking on my part to think that the writer, producer and director were actually trying to produce a fairy tale that could not be believed, and at the the same time to want to reveal the universal and human part of these young women; the part that needs to believe in happy endings.
(Maybe I believed in fairy tales far too long :) )
Anyway ... I agree with everything you have all said ... and am delighted that my daughters and friends are all so bright and articulate.
Post a Comment